Hayden Robinson

Empowered By Adversity

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5 min read
Emanuel Frowner in Kniks colors in position to throw the ball. His eyes are focused on the basket. Text Reads: Title, Empowered by Adversity. Subheading, Amidst life's hardships, Emanuel Frowner shines bright as a resilient advocate, performer, and athlete. Written by: Hayden Robinson. Body text reads:  To say that Emanuel Frowner (he/him) is a man of many talents would be an understatement. He is an autistic self-advocate, a public speaker, an actor, a CO/LAB (Creative Opportunities Without Limits and Boundaries) theater group leader, and a two-time Special Olympics gold medal-winning bowler. He is also a self-described die-hard Knicks fan! Emanuel grew up in the Bronx with his father, Byron Frowner, and his grandmother. On the weekends, Emanuel would visit his mother in Manhattan, or sometimes she would come to the Bronx to visit him. The neighborhood as Emanuel described, "was dangerous during my childhood because of fighting and drugs - a few people were killed. Therefore, I could not go out alone (until I was 17), and my folks were very protective of me." The Bronx was dangerous indeed for a black family and even more so for Emanuel because he was a quiet child and had a tendency to stutter. His grandmother told him that this was because he thought faster than he could talk and that a still tongue keeps a wise head. Emanuel took these as compliments, although that didn't keep him from being an easy target for bullies and harassers.
Self portrait of Emanuel Frowner wearing a rainbow tank top with the word "PROUD" written on it. He is looking at the camera and smiling. Text reads: For this reason, Byron was overprotective of Emanuel, not letting him play with other people because he thought his son would get injured easily. At school, unfortunately, this was a reality. Although Emanuel had such honors as being named student of the month, he was bullied by other students and teachers for being different. Eventually, his father had to homeschool Emanuel from sixth grade until completing his GED in 2000. Byron was against the curriculum being taught at the school, too, especially the content in history books. Another reason Emanuel was homeschooled is that Byron did not wish for his son to be diagnosed with a disability. Having a label meant having to take special ed classes, which would hinder Emanuel's chances to grow academically. He also didn't want Emanuel's brilliance and sensitivity to be overlooked just because he thought and acted differently from others. Emanuel's father loved him and wanted him to be happy and excel in whatever he set out to do, and homeschooling turned out to be a blessing. "Being homeschooled helped me excel academically," Emanuel said. "It also helped me develop a strong work ethic, and it helped me to think outside the box." Perhaps Emanuel's most significant life challenge is connecting with the people around him. He had trouble making friends, especially during his time as a student at both Bronx Community College and St. John's University. He tells us that he had one childhood friend, a student called Jonathan, from elementary school. They would hang out at Emanuel's place to play video games and sometimes go to Knicks games together. However, as they got older, they drifted apart  until they never spoke again. Emanuel told us recently, "I had to learn things on my own without my folks giving me unwanted advice on stuff like that. I have also had to end a few friendships and cut some people off because I had my autonomy taken from me by others trying to control me, which is not healthy for me." However, he adds more positively, "I made a few new friends along the way in part because I am in the process of unmasking myself and have set a few healthy boundaries and [am] working on myself." Throughout his life, he knew he was different. But his father dismissed it whenever Emanuel tried to talk to Byron about this. He would tell Emanuel to stop worrying so much about it, that no one wanted to hear Emanuel's problems, and not to focus on himself so much.
Emanuel Frowner's arm around John Starks shoulder, both smiling at the camera. This caused a rift between them, presumably because it felt like the parent was refusing to listen to his child, seeming to live in willful ignorance on the surface. It wasn't until 2006 that Emanuel Frowner received his autism diagnosis. Before this, he had not known anyone autistic except for his cousin Craig Jones, who was nonverbal and had been institutionalized since he was ten years old. Emanuel's brother Blair did some research and found the Severe Autism Center at Mt. Sinai. Emanuel had an interview and a few tests, and his mother took an A.D.I. (Autism Diagnostic Interview). After reviewing the results, the doctor told Emanuel that he was, in fact, autistic. This surprised him, but he took it as a blessing in disguise. It confirmed something he always knew to be true - he was different. It wasn't until 2008 that Emanuel finally opened up to his father about his diagnosis. To Emanuel's surprise, his father believed the test results, unlike previous dismissals.  However, Byron didn't regret his decision not to get Emanuel diagnosed earlier. Byron believed, at the time, that it would have hindered his son's academic achievements. In this, there is a mixed blessing. Emanuel's father may have prevented early access to treatment for Emanuel's needs. Yet, at the same time, his personal reasons are understandable. The unfair treatment of disabled adults and children in the United States of America comes to mind, particularly how students placed in Special Education are not given the same awards and benefits that mainstream students would receive. In general, expectations for BIPOC students are lower than white students; however, if a BIPOC student exceeded these expectations, they were pressured to keep this standard. This brings in an argument about whether the stigma behind a label and a diagnosis is caused by the education system focusing more on students' futures than the present. Such a focus harms the well-being of someone like Emanuel.
Emanuel Frowner taking a selfie. Emanuel's most notable passion is bowling. Drawn to ABC's Wide World of Sports and listening to the commentary by the likes of Chris Schenkel and Nelson Burton Jr., he would spend Saturdays between 1991-1997 taping the bowling sports events. He only missed one taping in March 1997, a few months before the show was taken off the air. "I did tape a few more," he tells us, "but it was not the same after that. Part of which was because bowling would not air on ABC anymore after June 1997, and I was bothered by this, and it did not feel the same." Whatever the case, whether from tapings or online videos, bowling is a fixation for Emanuel Frowner. He would go with his father to the bowling alley, and Byron, in awe of his son's passion, would watch him play over and over again. Of course, Emanuel would always play alone and not with other kids (perhaps one of many signs of Emanuel's neurodivergence). Emanuel admitted to us that he did not have much of a choice but to do it alone. From ages 10-14, his bowling endeavors went well, to say the least. He bowled his first 200 when he was 11. He held his highest-ever score at age 13, breaking a score of 246. Throughout his life, he has broken a 200 score fifteen times and twice about six months or so before the publication of this article. In 2023 alone, he has bowled six 200+ games. "I have had a few bad habits over the years (like my arm swing getting away from my body, sometimes double dribbling the ball, etc.)," Emanuel says, "and I never officially had a coach to see the bigger picture and to pinpoint strategies to demonstrate to me how to get better. My dad and a couple of others would be harsh on me when I would struggle for prolonged periods of time. These were why I had not bowled nearly as often for a few periods of time in my life."
Emanuel Frowner taking a selfie. In our candid conversation with Emanuel, he openly acknowledges the limitations he faces in bowling. These challenges have, at times, triggered doubts and insecurities within himself. Until this year's participation in the Special Olympics, he had never ventured into bowling leagues or received hands-on coaching, a circumstance largely influenced by Byron's decisions. Now, Emanuel eagerly expresses his desire for more coaching, recognizing its potential to enhance his consistency and pinpoint areas for improvement. However, it was during his Special Olympics participation that he found himself faced with ableism from his very own coach. Emanuel explains that his coach had a noticeable lack of empathy toward others. He says, "The coach was not too nice to me, and she did her best to take away my autonomy. When I got on the bus to the competition, we were all told to put down our face masks. When we got to the bowling alley, one person had to go to the bathroom, and a few of us had to go, also. She said, 'Monkey See, Monkey do.' To me, this was totally unnecessary and racist of her to say that. Then, she told me that I could  not dry off my bowling ball, I happened to finish early, and I happened to not take off my bowling shoes right away, and when she saw this, she demanded that I take off my shoes. When I tried to ask her a question, she still demanded that I take off my bowling shoes, and I did not think that this was necessary at all." Her attitude toward him, not thanking her when he won a medal in a competition and telling him that the Special Olympics was out of his league, has led to an ongoing investigation between both  parties involving Emanuel's associate director of programming and the coach's higher-ups. Like many autistics, Emanuel has faced this from people who not only choose not to understand the needs of others but wilfully disrespect them even if they are working with them to improve their odds.  One could say that Emanuel's aversion to letting this get him down has made him stronger; another could say that such attitudes toward neurodivergent people should
Pictures are screenshots of collabtheatergroup account. not happen in the first place. It would seem that, even in areas where he thrives and enjoys himself, he is forced to feel out of place. However, his passion and drive to succeed and better himself personally have kept such maliciousness from stopping him. He didn't win two gold medals in bowling because he let anyone stop him. Another area that Emanuel thrives in is acting. He acted in the romantic comedy Keep the Change (2017, directed by Rachel Israel), about disabled people finding love in New York City. He discussed his experience on how he came to be in the film during an interview on YouTube called Dating with Disabilities XII. After saying the film was based on a short version released in 2013, "In the summer of '15, she invited me to be a part of the longer version of Keep the Change, and I had to bring some outfits and see what they were working with, and things turned out well." The trailer on YouTube presents the film as a light-hearted, funny, romantic, and inclusive story. The film is available for purchase on DVD and can be streamed on platforms like Hoopla, Amazon Prime, and Vudu. Most of his focus in acting has been on theater, particularly his involvement with the CO/LAB theater group. Founded in 2011, this non-profit organization provides a creative outlet for individuals with developmental disabilities. It began with a class of thirteen actors; now, it boasts a full schedule of classes for actors and has staged original theatrical productions and musicals. The group's ambitions are to foster learning, growth, and artistic expression, providing an opportunity for those with fewer or no outlets to make a unique contribution. This aligns well with Emanuel, who has been part of the group for six years and became a leader for two. For Emanuel, acting and theater offers a chance for others to thrive in a space where such opportunities might not be available. This holds great significance for him  as an individual and an advocate. While leading others, Emanuel remains committed to his well-being, unmasking his true self and setting healthy boundaries. He wishes that others had understood him on his own terms from an early stage. Despite the challenges he's faced, especially since the passing of his closest relatives - his grandmother (2008), his father (2014) Still, his greatest accomplishment lies in his continuous dedication to learning and bringing out the best within himself. In everything Emanuel Frowner does, it is with a kind heart, a strong soul, and a vibrant personality.

Share in Emanuel's diverse interests by following him on Instagram.

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Writer | Author | Horror Fan | NaNoWriMo 2022 Winner